Wednesday, January 10, 2018

ten days in

Well hello.

We are 10 days into 2018 and I wanted to recap how I'm doing with my 'goals'. I also want to add to those who are already discouraged.. it takes 21 days to break or create a new habit. So if you have gone back to your old ways.. correct it and keep going the way you wanted. Redirect yourself. Don't let a fail hold you back!!

Goal 1: So my husband is still deployed and I feel that I have been nicer to him. Ive been listening to him more. It's hard to give up all my foundations to mold to his but I'm trying. It's also hard for me to run a household for almost 2 years and welcome him back to change things up. It's extremely hard. My husband is very financially directed & he'll give up every luxury in the world to stay where he wants too. It drives me insane - I''m more of the pay bills first and live your life & that drives him nuts.  I'm not a saver, penny pincher, budgeter.. I try but I'm just not. I don't understand knowing gas pricies b/c it's something that you need. Driving 20 min out of your way for .20 is ridiculous to me.. but my husband will go the extra miles for the cheaper price tag. I am trying to follow a budget, to create goals.. I need to have goals. I need to have rewards.. I need to pay a bill off and reward myself. My husband doesn't understand that

Goal 2: has been a lot more challenging. I did, however, order a 3rd trash can so that I can start purging. So there is a plus to that. I have also purged the garage and my sons clothing.

Goal 3: this one has been a great win. I've paid off 5 store cards and 1 credit card. I've started a savings too.  My goal is to close the 4 of 5 store cards and the 1 credit card. I did create a budget as I mentioned above also but the husband wants to revise it when he gets home.

Goal 4: the only thing I've managed is to remove my cc's from the checkout page. I've ordered from them since new years. It's so darn addictive! I have no self control when it comes to NOT getting two kids out and still getting your items. Like I just got 2 car seats for the price of 1! That;s a great deal and it was shipped to my door! i know I know.. I gotta stop using them. This is going to be my hardest goal... I'm telling you.

How have you guys done with your goals? Anyone still strong 5 days in?



Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Goodbye 2017

I'm so ready for 2018 - simply because my husband comes home & we have our 3rd child. I'm ready to NOT be pregnant anymore & I'm so beyond ready to have my husband home again. I cant' being to explain how much I want my husband home right this very second.  Normally I shy away from resolutions because well it's kind of a fad. So while it takes a while to institute something into a routine people generally give up a week after stating their new goal.

Goal #1: Be Nicer to my Husband. Lets face it - I'm a B to my husband. He deserves better. It's my goal to really put him first. These past two years really put into perspective just how much I want to be around him. So the next items are also in-conjunction to #1.

Goal #2: De Clutter: We got too much. Time to de-clutter. I want to be a minimalist or try to be. Time to purge and donate.

Goal #3: SAVE: I want to payoff. I want to spend less and save more. I want to create a realistic budget and stick with it. I want to really really focus on finances this year and better all of our lives.

Goal 4#: AMAZON. I spend a lot of money at Amazon - so for #3 to work I gotta do #4. Removing all my cc's off my profile to make ordering harder. Unless it's in the budget NO AMAZON.


Those are the short versions of my wish list. Remember when setting your goals.. they are meant to be hard and even if you fail.. just keep going!


Friday, December 15, 2017

Well Hello.

Well Hello!






I was reading my last post in Nov "Skipping Christmas" and I've held true to my words. I've bought little man a couple of 'Little People' figurines because he's actually playing pretend. I bought Little Dude a gift or two but he's so small he has no idea what is what. I did buy my Starbucks cup, holiday blend and ornament. I also bought the Holiday barbie like I said I would. I did buy my nephew a book from "wonderbly" because a friend sent me a $5 coupon. I also sent my husband a Christmas care package, which he received two days ago. My tree is beautiful and is half full -- meaning I only did personal ornaments on the TOP half of the tree b/c little man wont leave them alone -- lol.
~I bought Little Man the Little People advent calendar amazon special & it is a HUGE hit. I couldn't wait to open them all up and let him play so we didn't do the 'day by day' portion. He loves them. He carries the little cat, the little dog and the reindeer everywhere. I think he thinks the reindeer is a dog; which makes me laugh because we have Pomeranian's and a Great Dane. (We also have two cats, but they are mostly outside). Anyway the fact that he thinks the reindeer is a dog makes me chuckle.

~Little Miss is now at 22 weeks gestation. Her room is almost finished & I am SUPER proud of how it's turning out. The color scheme is pink, white and gold - which was inspired by a picture I found on pinterest. I am waiting on Dad to put the crib & dresser together. I mean he's done it with the past two so I'm not letting him skimp out on #3's. I haven't even bought the bed or dresser yet. I still have to buy a 'big boy' car seat for little Dude to transition into. I also need to decide on purchasing a new rock n play because our old one doesn't vibrate anymore. I really haven't jumped into the whole girl clothes thing yet either. I have been getting clothes from people, which is GREAT, but I need to buckle down and make sure I have enough newborn through 3 months clothes.  really not into sweets. I'm so happy I can still drink my Dr Pepper and coffee - with the boys I couldn't at all - but I'm still getting my H20 intake in. The only issue I've had is with my back. It's actually how I found out I was pregnant. I thought I bruised my tailbone. The small of my back hurts so incredibly bad. I get to pick on big chore of the day and tackle it.. by the end of the day I can barely move. SO I time my day around my back. Getting a massage helps big time and the OB has decided that it's tension related and there is absolutely nothing they can do. SO I'm just hoping the hubby gets home soon before I get to the point I can't move at all - exaggeration but I would be nice to delegate some chores to help me. Right now all the chores fall into my lap I put off grocery shopping, or leaving the house, as long as I can. I pick a day and a chore gets done. I had to cut back on Little Man's appointments because getting the kids in and out of the car takes a toll as well. Tylenol helps, heating pad helps, massages help, and warm baths help. I have been given permission to take ibuprofen, no more the 600 mg in a 24 hr period, but that seriously scares me so I've stuck with Tylenol.
With this pregnancy I hardly feel pregnant. She rarely moves, which I keep hearing is normal for a girl at this stage, but it bothers me. She craves steak and asparagus, she hasn't really repelled food but I'm

~Little Dude can sit up on his own, and crawl on all fours - backwards. He is super calm and quiet. He only complains when he is hungry, tired or has pooped. He does great with floor time play but loves his jumpy. I'm really anxious for him to start talking. I think he has said "hi" and "Momma" but that's usually when we first wake up and I can't be sure of anything before coffee.. hahaha.

~Little Man has started talking all of a sudden. He is saying real words you can understand! He sings songs like 'EIEIO' and "wheels on the bus". He tells me "ow", 'up', 'eat', 'go', and he does a LOT of gibberish. He can say the whole alphabet, his numbers to 10, and his colors. He lines everything up in a color pattern in a OCD manner.. but otherwise he is doing great! I'm still not getting him to sleep in his own bed all night long. I'm trying be he wont make it the whole night. For a child who was just diagnosed with Autism I think his talking and playing pretend are AWESOME! Which I also wanna add that this time last year he just stopped talking and last week he just woke up talking. It is the CRAZIEST thing.

Alright guys.. that's all I got. Hopefully I can find time after the holidays to post a New Years post. I actually have resolutions. Merry Christmas y'all.

Amy

Thursday, November 2, 2017

skipping Christmas

So it's 7 weeks from Christmas and I have a huge announcement.
We are skipping Christmas.
We aren't  giving and receiving gifts this year. I'm not buying Christmas gifts this year, at all. I'm not baking mounds of cookies, I'm not going to race around town for wrapping paper and tape. I'm not going to rush packages at the post office and I'm not going to blow my amazon account up with orders. I'm not going to fight crowds at the grocery store or the mall. I'm not going to make a list and spend a ton of money on trinkets and stocking junk. I'm not going to buy cookie dough and a gallon of milk for Santa.
I am going to put up a tree and lights. but I'm not decorating my whole house like I usually do. I will take the boys for pictures for Santa and I ordered their Christmas pj's in July from Gentry's closet.com  I will display stockings but I'm not going to fill them. I will buy some ornaments and a Starbucks cup (because.. it's my personal tradition.) I also always purchase the Holiday Barbie doll and ornament, for my future daughter, but those are usually my birthday presents to myself. And I will send my husband a Christmas care package.
Someone reading this is gasping in disbelief but the truth is my kids & I don't need anything. We have all that we need and I can't stand the commercialization around gifts. I'm not bragging but I am being humble. My living room is swimming in toys and some they have barely touched. If I can break myself from going overboard, like I do every year, then I have a chance to teach my kids the meaning of Christmas... togetherness. Then maybe they won't be disappointed in a gift someone spent their hard money on. Then maybe we won't have disappointed teenagers b/c they didn't get the latest and greatest. We did decide one gift from Santa and one from the parents. Last year i bought little man ten gifts from Santa, five from parents and stocking stuffers. All he cared about was the push car and his plush crayons.. everything else may as well have been returned.
And the BIGGEST reasons of all are:
1. Santa's not here. He'll be gone this year and it just doesn't feel like Christmas without him.
2. I'm grossly pregnant with #3 and I don't want to run all over town picking up things and because Dad is gone.. I barely have time to surf facebook let alone thousands of stores for the right gifts.
3. I just don't give a damn. I just don't give two shits if we get anything or not. Our house is full and I hate Christmas because of the demand and expectations of gifts.
It's semi sad and semi crazy BUT this preggo single Mom of 2 is giving herself a break while Dad is deployed.

AMY

Friday, October 13, 2017

it is a.....

I couldn't wait any longer so I found a place that would do gender reveals at 13 weeks. I found a place close by and went with a friend. They were able to get us straight in and she told me it may not be 100% they would be able to tell b/c it's recommended that people wait until 16 weeks. I wanted to move forward anyway. SO here we were getting to find out if we were having a boy or girl. I was certain it was a boy and my friend was certain it was a girl! When we started the ultrasound the little one was all laying on it's side with it's hands up by it's ears. You could see the jaw line so clearly! We got to watch as the baby played with it's side of it's head and moved it's legs around. It was really neat to see the little nugget just playing and reacting to my laughs or just talking in general. I must yell little man's name a lot b/c the baby really reacted when I called his name out!
Long story short here.. you could clearly tell that the baby is a....


We have her named picked out since we were pregnant in 2015 with little man. Other people have used her name but I'm not wavering.  I haven't narrowed down a middle name but I have time. The husband really wanted a girl and so I'm happy he finally got his 'princess'. I really wanted another boy but I'm just as happy with this baby being a girl. I save all Little Dudes clothes for nothing but I'll just donate them! The godparents were one of the first people to know gender. The godfather of the kids is on deployment but I sent him the gender and he send a e-mail telling my husband. My husband thought I was going to tell his boss via e-mail so he was really surprised! We got him good.. as he has told us..

It's a girl.. holy shit we are having a girl. I still can't believe it. My OB even double checked the pictures b/c he said you couldn't really tell at 13 weeks and then said he stood corrected b/c she is clearly a she! I am great boy Mom.. I just have never given much thought to really being a girl Mom. I'm not as girly as people think.. I do "high maintenance" things but I'm not girly. Hopefully with the help of her brothers I can raise a girly tomboy.. lmao.   Miss E is due April 2018!! 

Monday, October 9, 2017

lame holiday plans

the boys are currently napping.. at the same time.. it's a miracle! Normally I'd be taking advantage of the dual naps but ending out my first trimester I have managed to gain some extra energy. I've used most of it to 'attempt' to clean. I never seem to clean or pick up or wash enough.. ooh or cook enough. I swear as soon I clean my kitchen I have to cook another meal and it's chaos again. I think I've leveled up on laundry and have a single load of bathroom rugs to wash - which is a miracle.
So the holidays are fastly approaching and I don't want to do any of them. Instead of costumes and candy I'm thinking of ideas of how to avoid the whole holiday. I've actually thought of creating a poster board that tells people to leave my house alone. Then again.. all we do is pass out candy so what would it hurt?? My wallet.. that's what it hurts. A costume for little man, $50 worth of candy to hand out, the dogs barking all night long, and i'm a single mom with two small kids -- i don't want to have time for it. During dinner time, bath time and bedtime...  I haven't made up my mind but I'm pretty sure I'm not going to participate this year.
Also since "Santa" is on deployment I think we are skipping that too. The kids DO NOT need a thing, but I do plan on doing Santa pictures and putting up a tree. I don't want to do the whole day.. the whole waking up on Christmas to open gifts.. they don't understand.. plus Santa's not here. It just doesn't feel right without Santa. It will be :Little Dudes first Christmas so the pictures with Santa are important. I have decided that missing Thanksgiving last year was the worst.. so I'm going to down scale the whole event and create my favorites. I'm thinking of that for Christmas day too.
I find out gender of baby 3 in a couple of days and I'm pretty sure it's another boy. I'm actually VERY excited that it might be another boy. I'm having small heart attacks thinking about 3 kids in diapers so being able pass down clothes again would be amazing. I've gotten a lot of the overall decor plans ironed out.. just waiting to make sure it's really a boy before I move forward. While I am saying that we are finding out gender this week, I am not announcing gender any time soon. I have a plan for the husband to find out gender before anyone else. I created a gender box.. half blue / half pink candy.. but he hasn't gotten it yet. I'll find out gender before he gets the box, which sucks because I'm emailing the results to a very good friend, who is also on deployment, and he'll email the husband with the results. I really wanted the husband to get the box first since it's a "is it a boy or girl" box and won't really make sense if he already knows gender BEFORE it's gets to him. So after the husband finds out gender he can choose to announce it or not.. I think it's important to have him participate in some way.
So there ya go.. our lame holiday plans. My brother said I was being unfair to the boys but it sucks doing all of this by myself. At least the husband got to come home last year for Christmas and that made it so much more exciting.

Have you made plans for the holidays yet?

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

then there were three

Sitting here watching my kiddo's & thinking about how our lives are going to change again. Little Dude and Little Man are both on the floor playing... but not together. Little Dude is being fussy because he doesn't want to do tummy time. Little Man is quietly playing on the floor while a snot ball rolls down his lip and I know if I jump up to wipe it - it's going to be on his hands and all over his face. Yep told ya! Why do kids fight their nose being wiped?? So while I examine our little world of chaos I can't help but think about the little nugget growing in my stomach. The tinge of fear that creeps up, the questions I can't answer and all the decisions that are yet to come. I close my eyes and silently lie telling myself that my husband is never getting any again. I'm excited. I'm so happy & excited that we were able to create this little nugget. I'm so thankful that we get this experience but I could have waited a little longer in between kids.. but that wasn't the plan I guess.

I have decided to NOT do a nursery. I have decided that I'm going to purchase a Graco DreamGlider. Once this baby can roll over on his own I'll do a nursery for both little nugget and little dude to share. Considering they are so close to age - I think they will be fine to share a room - unless of course little nugget is a girl and throw a wrench in all my plans. I'm going to put my nesting energy into the house and try to get some things done. I think by putting off purchasing a baby bed and dresser won't really save us considering we'll need it anyway... so I may purchase the matching set to little dude after Christmas. BUT if we are having another boy then I can put all my energy into the house like I had planned. I'll just need to purchase diapers and his bed set.

What are the house plans? I'm going to change out the kitchen table and add a area rug under it, I'm going to add three end tables with lamps in the living room and change out the area rug. My biggest plan is to change the wall color in the kitchen, living room and hallway. I'm also going to take down the kids picture walls" and put all the pictures in the living room. I think I'm going to switch rooms with Little Dude and Little man. I won't have to change anything decor wise. I also need to organize the attached garage and really work on the back yard. I'd like to turn the garage into a play area using the interlocking play foam puzzle pieces but that's last on the list.

At the moment I'm trying to find my balance. To find me balance of getting chores done, sleeping and taking care of these little monsters. I want to do more than just survive.. and it's getting hard. I'm so tired!! I wish I could make them send my husband home lol. but I'll just tough it out.
That's all I got for now..

Sunday, August 27, 2017

what the what?!

For the past month I have been waiting to be seen by my primary doctor because I thought I had a hormone imbalance. After being on medicines for years for infertility I've gotten to know the ups and downs of my own body. I started getting headaches in the evenings, I started feeling super tired all the time - like I wasn't sleeping good, I also noticed I gained a substantial amount in a short amount of time. I geared up and asked my Dr's nurse to put in for some blood work to check my hormone levels so we could find a suitable birth control pill to help regulate my hormones in fluctuations.
Before my husband left he started talking about having a 3rd baby.. actually a lot of people were asking us if we were going to have another. I simply said no. I didn't want to go through more treatments and I am very happy with the two I have. We have a lot on our plate with Little Man and all his appointments and I simply couldn't think of having a third child.
My plan for this current deployment was to be at the gym as much as my schedule would allow. I have two guaranteed days during the week and as soon as Thomas' ABA kicked in I'd be able to go almost everyday. I dusted off the PIYO I bought last year and I was ready to really start my new routines. I even pinned and googled several 'at home' workouts in case my schedule didn't work and I couldn't make it to the gym.  I was determined to drop 30 pounds in 6-7 months and even decided to go back to the paleo diet. I had agreed with myself that Sept 1 would be my start day and I would rock this deployment.
I got a call saying the Dr's office had a cancellation and I took the appointment. Hours later my husband got a call saying he was flying out at the same time so I had to cancel. I called Friday to see if they had another cancellation so I could take it before the 6th of Sept. The nurse I had been speaking too requested that I take a at home pregnancy test to rule that out.. I scoffed. The Dr's assured us there was no way we could have a natural conception. After calling a friend to vent my frustration she agreed with the nurse.. why not? It wouldn't hurt anything. So before picking up little man from school I stopped at a WalGreens and was cursing myself for wasting $15 on two pregnancy tests.
My friend and I remained on the phone and as I arrived home with both boys sound asleep and the urge to pee - I took a test. I laughed and rolled my eyes at the notion that I was really going to fall for this. I was going to take a test, it was going to be negative because it always has been and I'd be discouraged for the rest of the day. ((It has always been negative without Dr intervention)). So here I am chatting away with my friend, because she wanted to stay on the phone, and pee'ing on a stick.. when the first circle filled with my urine I saw a bright blue line appear and a moment later another blue line. what the hell?! So naturally I started laugh crying.. and ran to grab a bottle of water... no way.. my friend is now laughing hysterically on the other end of the phone while my mind is racing full speed. This is false.. this is a false positive test.. there is no way I could be pregnant. Little Dude is FOUR MONTHS OLD.. there is no way after years of treatments and Dr's saying it couldn't be done.. that we created a baby through natural conception. Apx 20 min later, pregnancy test in hand, I repeated the steps and took my 2nd pregnancy test. Same results.. positive.. bright blue positive.  I ended up taking a total of five.. all positive results.. before conceding in a ball in my kitchen floor that this was really happening.
I can't get in until Sept 18th for a OB check up and by my calculations I'm already 7 weeks along so adding two more puts me at 9 weeks - four weeks shy of completing my first trimester. what the what! All I can do now is move forward .. I could go to the office and take a walk in pregnancy test.. but I don't think that would move anything forward any faster. I think I'm pretty content with waiting two more weeks but I do need to call and change the reason for the appointment. I'm excited that at our appointment that I'll get a ultrasound done so I'll be able to have proof and hear a heartbeat .. this is so unreal.
I was done. I was ready to move forward and be so content with two kids. I was so ready to box up all the baby stuff and donate it all. I was so ready to focus on being healthy and not worrying about being pregnant for the first time since I was 23. I was ready.. but seeing those two blue lines (five different times) just make me want this baby too. I wanted a baby that we didn't know our conception date, I wanted a baby that we didn't have to take medicine to concieve,  I wanted a "i have no idea when this happened" baby but I didn't think it was obtainable.
So now I'll be in the 3 under three club.. insane. Inconceivably insane. This little one will be born before Little Dudes first birthday and Little Man's third. My head keeps spinning with crazy questions.. like how do you go to the grocery store? You can't wear two kids! Can two kids fit in the front basket together? My current infant carseat was manufactured in 2014.. should last 6 years.. but should I get a new one? Does this kid get his own nursery or do I make him bunk with Little Dude or do i put Little Man and Little Dude in a room together? The baby will be sleeping with us for a while.. just like little Dude is now. Until they can roll over on there own my babies sleep in a rock n play next to my bed during the night. Which means I'll also need to update the current rock n play b/c it's gone through 3 kids.. (it was a hand me down from a friend and has been amazing!) My husband is always encouraging me to not run out and buy a crib b/c of this reason and I might just do that this time simply b/c I can't picture how to make the room situation work. OH MY GOD I'll need a new car! There is now way my awesome Escape can hold three car seats on that back row! Two full size and infant seats.. I'll have to move up to a bigger SUV. I wanted a truck.. I have been building my own F150 for months!  Not to mention Dr's appointments with two kids in tow! I'm going to have to find a sitter for those appointments or make them during little man's classes... {{this is how my mind has been racing for two days}}.
While it sounds like I'm complaining - I'm simply processing. Normally our kids are very planned so this is just a whirlwind. Another deployment and another pregnancy .. at least I know he'll make it home this time. I'm still in shock but very happy. I'm really worried my body didn't heal enough and concerned about my c-section scar (which has been bothering me for a couple of weeks). I've really got to manage my weight and hit the gym for this pregnancy b/c I'm heavier than I want to be, even though i typically don't gain a whole bunch. ((under 20 pounds)). SMH...  second best deployment ever! 

Thursday, August 24, 2017

August update

Gosh, it's been a whole month already. The husband just left for another 7 month deployment. Kinda nerve racking. I know I can handle it but man it's a lot. I just wish I could have gotten more done and didn't feel so alone.
Little Dude just turned 4 months this past week. He is rolling over on his side but is horrible on tummy time. He can totally do everything else but he isn't the greatest in tummy time.
Little man is keeping us all super busy! We have speech on Monday, OT (occupational therapy) on Tuesday's, a two n half hour school class on Wednesday & Friday's. We haven't started ABA services yet but we are  working on that.. but I have heard that he'll have five hours DAILY. I literally have no life that doesn't revolve around his therapy.
My mind is going a mile a minute. I want nothing more than to spend a day at the beach being childless and drinking a beer. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids but Momma needs a break. I want to get so much done over the next six months and I'm not sure it will be realistic. I'd like to repaint the whole inside, I'd like to replace the kitchen table and the area rug in the living room. At the same time I really just want to be a hermit and save so much money to pay some bills off. So the plan is to balance both.. which I think is very plausible.
Since I have five hours a day with ABA services the plan is to hit the gym with little Dude. We also have 2.5 hours free during the school time frame too. I wanna carve some Mommy and little Dude time in, plus carve in some just Mommy time too. Thursday's I'd like to make to go out and check out different things. I haven't tackled going to the beach with just the kids by myself yet.. but i'm willing to try.
I've also want to work on a group of schedules... I'd like to get some meal planning done. I find that coming home with a hungry kid is horrible. I need/want to create some food/snacks that are already ready when we get home. Monday's is a late day I really need to start dinner in a crock pot kinda thing before I leave. I'd like to create a workable leaning schedule and get groups of things done by the day.. because there are days I look up and it's 4pm. I'm not sure where the rest of the day went. I'm also planning on going back to the paleo diet too. SHould help cutt down spending and make it easier to meal prep.

Saturday, July 29, 2017

July update.

Little man turned 2! Holy guacamole!
We ordered him a dump truck scene cake .. so dirty with trucks placed on it... they ran out of cars so they upgraded the cake. It was huge! It was delicious but it was huge! So we added a couple of his favorite cars, invited some neighbors and a couple of friends with kids and ate some cake.
We did pictures at JCP that afternoon - which are adorable! We also had a Dr's appointment (without shots) and found out that little man was 26lbs, 3ft tall and was able to flip around in his car seat. The next morning we went out for a IHOP pancake breakfast. His big gift this year was a swing set! Man, does he love to swing! Grandma from Texas sent him some PJ's and he got some pull back cars from amazon.. (from Mom). I think it was a great 2nd birthday!!!



Little Dude just turned 3 months old.. like what?! I can't believe he is 3 months old!! He is apx 14 pounds - wearing 3-6 month clothing, and trying so incredibly hard to sit up! He coo's and goo's, he is super punctual about eating, and he sleeps 6 straight hours at night! He is growing up so super quickly!!
Now I just gotta figure out what i'm going to do with all his clothes he has outgrown. The husband is talking baby #3 already but I think this baby factory has closed up shop. I'm not going through more fertility treatments - so we'd have to have a real miracle baby.



The husband is back home. He came home at the end of June. It has been a fun adjustment but a adjustment. I have gotten so used to doing everything myself, and man do I need a break, but to expect him to come in and just know the routines.. that's just insane. 
BUT
Now that we are getting the hang of things we are just learning that they are trading him to another command. We don't have official dates on everything yet but it looks like he will be leaving in September (yes, next month) for a 7-9 month deployment. The ship he'll be joining just left and he'll have to fly out to catch up with them.
While I understand it's the nature of the beast.. let's just say I'm NOT happy. I just completed 15 months with him gone and he'll be home for almost two months and gone for another 7-9 months... 15 + 9 = 24.. two years.  We can't fight the orders.. so it is what it is. 


While he is gone this time I'm going to focus on dropping weight and getting a good schedule for us. My plan is to go to the gym or do 'in home' workouts five days a week. I'll also be focusing on clean eating and increasing my water intake. I have adapted a very unhealthy Dr Pepper addiction after Little Dude was born.
We have our old roomie moving back in at the end of Sept, which will help us out quite a bit. My brother will also be moving back to SD later this year; which is another great bonus.
Little Man has already started speech but we will be adding Occupational therapy & he'll also be starting a 'early start' school. My plan is to use his school time (three hours) to go to the gym. It's going to be a lot challenging this round and even more challenging for the husband to just 'plop' back into our schedule. 

I'm also searching for 'who I am' during all of this too. I'm more than just a Mom and a wife. I have interest and hobbies that I have yet to explore. I'd like for Little Dude to get a little bit older but start doing beach days throughout the week. We've become hermits, unintentionally, and I really need to make an effort to break that cycle. Little Man does so good in public situations - so I really need to make that a focus. Although I'm still debating on keeping my Y membership - we will just have to see what the schedule allows once all the chips fall into place.
I have a couple of things I'd like to accomplish this next deployment but my main focus will be on weight loss & getting a better schedule. I will also be adding a 'night' off for myself either once or twice a month. Ya know where I hire a sitter to go catch a movie, or dinner, or a pedicure.. because I didn't do that the past fifteen months. I also need to understand and let it be ok to take a break and breath.


I'm very serious about skipping Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I already bought the boys their monogrammed Christmas pj's from #gentryscloset and I'll be doing our annual family pictures - for the boys anyway - but that's about it. I do need to get Little Due a stocking - since the one I ordered last year has a different name on it but I'm not going all out with decorations, gifts, and baking this year. The kids don't need anything and they are little enough that they will never know. If you personally know me then you know that's insane - Christmas is one of my favorite holidays but I just want a break. I just want to take a deep breath and get back to the basics of family without the expectations of everything else. Nothing is more important than my little family and I really let the unimportant stuff take a back seat. Decorated tree's, cookies, gifts.. all of it at the end of the day is really just unimportant... it makes us feel good.. but it's not that serious. 

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